There is such a thing as consideration.
Consideration to help someone out.
Consideration to house people in your home.
Consideration to make their accommodations and comfortable as possible.
Consideration to help them take the steps in their next chapter in life…
But sometimes its SO HARD to WANT to help people when they don’t share the same considerations as their hosts.
Consideration for their schedules and time.
Consideration for their hosts putting in the effort.
Consideration to tell their hosts if plans change or schedules need to be adjusted.
What is even more frustrating is that strangers have far more consideration than the family closest to you.
Here is where I go into a full on rant, sans sugar coating.
I can’t for the life of me understand why people (and when I say people, I mean my folks) choose the hard way to do things. I want to believe that they make the decisions they do because it HAS to be done that way.. but a large part of me doubts what they decide and how they decide because the options provided to them aren’t what they wanted in the first place.
Here is what I am pondering: Let me ask you interwebs.. If you were given the option to stay in a house with a bed, room, amenities and such. Would you rather stay in that house or sleep on the floor of an empty townhome?
Here’s the nuts and bolts: The parents are trying to clean out the townhouse for rental. After moving day they were offered a place to stay. A few days before moving day, they decided to stay at said townhome and sleep on the floor because they have to “clean and fix things.” One would think that would mean a couple days.. but they are talking about more than 7 days.
Whats driving me crazy: Why would you want to sleep on the floor when there is a perfectly good bed? I was told that they don’t want to make the trip between households but the distance between the homes is only a drive of 5-7 minutes! I could understand if it was one to two days.. but for over a week? Who wants to sleep on the floor for that long? Who does that? Maybe young’uns that can fall asleep in a heap on the floor from a drunken stupor.. but we are talking about 55+ year olds! All that stress and aching bones sleeping on the floor for the simple reason (excuse I say) that they don’t want to travel back and forth between house to clean and finish up the house.. I call BS. Not to mention that plans and things are being made without considering the other parties involved… How do you ask for help, set a schedule, then up and change those plans without letting anyone know? Who wouldn’t be irritated by that? Who wouldn’t resent helping someone if they were the last to know about changes?
What I believe is really going on: I think and have always thought that there is a sense of entitlement, pride and selfishness. The idea of being in control and feeling that they are entitled to that control because they are the parents.. Its frustrating.. It puts the kids in an awkward position and leaves all of us in a haze of resentment of sorts. Not of each other but of the decisions being made and the reasons (read: excuses) given for them. Sometimes I find myself frustrated thinking – If you didn’t want to stay there, then why didn’t you say so to begin with? Is it because you can’t control the house? Because you can’t manipulate the people in it? I hope that they don’t think they can control or manipulate my household because that is NOT how it works. A guest is a guest and they should act like guests.
Just had to get my frustrations out.. I am sure I am leaving a lot out, but trust me when I say, I usually don’t get frustrated over things.. but if I do, I’m not doing it lightly.